“My father won't be here for ever” – Ballymena son organises charity quiz amid dad's battle with incurable illness
Matthew Armstrong with his much-loved dad, Dessie
Tuesday 10 November 2026
“The fact of the matter is my father won't be here for ever.”
For Ballymena councillor Matthew Armstrong, those words capture the deeply personal reason behind a charity fundraiser he is organising for people living with pulmonary fibrosis – an incurable lung condition that has changed life for his father, Dessie, and their family.
What began as a persistent dry cough in summer 2019 led to a diagnosis that Matthew initially found too difficult to contemplate. Seven years on, he has watched his father gradually lose the ability to enjoy many of the everyday activities they once shared.
Now, Matthew is bringing the Ballymena community together for a charity quiz on Friday 20 November, hoping to raise money for Pulmonary Fibrosis NI (PFNI), the organisation that has helped his father, while ensuring other families know that support is available.
A persistent cough that changed everything
Dessie Armstrong's illness first became apparent through a dry cough that simply would not go away. When the symptoms persisted, his GP recommended further tests, which revealed pulmonary fibrosis.
The condition causes scarring of the lungs, making them stiffer and reducing their ability to transfer oxygen into the bloodstream. It can lead to increasing breathlessness, fatigue and difficulties carrying out ordinary daily activities.
For Matthew, the knowledge that his father's illness could not be cured was initially overwhelming. Rather than immediately researching the condition, he found himself avoiding information about what the future might hold.
Reflecting on that difficult period, Matthew said:
"The illness is incurable and so I didn't want to research the illness or know anything more than that initially, it's a hard thing to process but as time wore on I took an interest in what it does to the body and how it affects daily living."
As time passed, the realities of the diagnosis became increasingly apparent. Matthew noticed his father slowing down, with the illness affecting his appetite, ability to travel, driving and even simple exercise.
Perhaps most difficult was seeing the impact on the relationship they had always enjoyed as father and son. Activities and shared interests that once brought them together became harder for Dessie to manage.
It was not just Dessie who had to adjust. The diagnosis changed everyday family life, with Matthew's mother taking on the demands of caring for her husband.
Matthew was keen to recognise her dedication, saying:
"My mum is the real hero of it all though, and never misses a beat in providing care for my dad."
A son's determination to give something back
Living alongside his father's illness has given Matthew a greater appreciation of the challenges faced by people with pulmonary fibrosis and those who care for them.
It has also strengthened his determination to support the charity that has helped Dessie navigate life with the condition.
Explaining his motivation for organising the fundraiser, Matthew spoke candidly about knowing that time with his father is precious and wanting to do something meaningful while they can still share it.
"The fact of the matter is my father won't be here for ever and I know he feels strongly about the support PFNI have given him and its the least I can."
For Matthew, the evening is not simply about collecting donations. He wants to encourage conversations about an illness that he believes remains poorly understood, despite affecting more families locally than many people might realise.
"It's all about awareness and in having conversations with and about my dad it's scary how many people locally are affected. It's a lesser known and understood illness and I would really like people in our area to know that support and help are out there for them."
Finding friendship and hope through shared experience
For Dessie, the support provided by Pulmonary Fibrosis NI has offered something that medical treatment alone cannot always provide – the reassurance of knowing that other people understand what he is going through.
Through the charity, he has attended online meetings and coffee mornings, received practical advice on managing symptoms and learned more about available treatments. He has also benefited from activities such as chair-based exercise sessions.
These opportunities have helped him stay connected with others facing similar challenges, offering encouragement and understanding during difficult times.
Describing what that support has meant to him, Dessie said:
"it has boosted my morale and keep my spirits up. It makes such a difference to know there are other people out there experiencing the same thing as me and are always willing to provide support when needed"
His words underline why Matthew is so determined to help the organisation continue its work. Beyond the physical challenges of pulmonary fibrosis, the condition can bring uncertainty, isolation and considerable emotional pressure for patients and their loved ones.
For families like the Armstrongs, having somewhere to turn for advice, friendship and reassurance can make a meaningful difference.
Supporting patients, carers and bereaved families
Pulmonary Fibrosis NI began as a patient support group at Antrim Area Hospital in 2015 and became a registered charity in 2022.
Today, it supports people living with pulmonary fibrosis, their carers, families and bereaved relatives across Northern Ireland, helping them navigate the practical and emotional challenges associated with the condition.
Weekly online meetings provide opportunities to speak with others who understand the illness and hear from healthcare professionals. Dedicated WhatsApp groups, telephone conversations and individual support help members stay connected and access information when they need it.
The charity also recognises the often unseen pressures experienced by those caring for someone with a serious lung condition – something Matthew understands through witnessing his mother's commitment to Dessie.
Its Pete & Tilly Club provides support for people who have lost loved ones, while coffee clubs, local gatherings and wellbeing activities help reduce isolation and build friendships.
Providing respite and helping children understand illness
PFNI also offers opportunities for families to spend valuable time together away from the pressures of everyday life.
Its two respite facilities, Puffin Lodge in Ballycastle and Inis Ceithleann Retreat at Lough Erne Golf Resort in Enniskillen, provide members and their families with opportunities for rest and recuperation.
Recognising that serious illness can be particularly difficult to explain to children, the charity developed an illustrated book, Pete the Puffling's Brave Adventure, to help families discuss pulmonary fibrosis in an accessible and sensitive way.
PFNI says the book is being translated and distributed internationally, with 16 countries included in the initiative, supported through collaboration with the European Pulmonary Fibrosis Foundation and Boehringer Ingelheim.
A second book, Grandpa Percy's Brave Adventure, is being developed for a planned launch in spring 2027. It will explore organ donation and lung transplantation, helping families discuss these sensitive subjects with younger relatives.
These resources form part of the charity's wider work to ensure that people affected by pulmonary fibrosis, including children and carers, have access to understanding and support.
Ballymena invited to rally behind the Armstrong family
Matthew hopes friends, neighbours, colleagues and the wider Ballymena community will come together for an enjoyable evening while helping PFNI continue supporting families across Northern Ireland.
The charity table quiz will take place at the Services Club on Trostan Avenue on Friday 20 November, beginning at 7pm.
Entry costs just £5 per person, with teams of up to six welcome to take part. Local singer and musician Rodney Beggs will provide live entertainment after the quiz, and there will also be raffle prizes.
No advance registration is necessary, meaning anyone wishing to support the cause can simply turn up on the night.
Charity quiz at a glance
• Date: Friday 20 November 2026
• Time: 7pm
• Venue: Services Club Ballymena, 52 Trostan Avenue, Ballymena, BT43 7BL
• Entry: £5 per person
• Teams: Maximum six people
• Entertainment: Live music from Rodney Beggs after the quiz
• Also featuring: Raffle prizes
• Registration: Not required – simply turn up and bring a friend
• Supporting: Pulmonary Fibrosis NI
Anyone unable to attend but wishing to contribute can make a donation through the Armstrong family or visit https://pulmonaryfibrosisni.co.uk/.
Further information about PFNI's services and support is available through its website at www.pulmonaryfibrosisni.co.uk, its Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/445013243052103 or by emailing hello@pulmonaryfibrosisni.co.uk.
More than a fundraiser for one family
For Matthew, the evening represents an opportunity to turn a painful family experience into something positive – supporting the organisation that has helped his father while reaching others who may be facing similar circumstances.
His hope is that people will come along not only to enjoy the quiz and entertainment, but also to learn more about pulmonary fibrosis and the help available to those living with it.
Behind the fundraising appeal is a son who has watched his father's world become smaller because of illness, a mother whose daily care has helped him through it, and a family grateful for the people who have stood alongside them.
Dessie shares part of his journey in this video.
As they look ahead to the event, Matthew and Dessie have a simple message for their community:
"We are both grateful for the support of friends, family and neighbours and hope that anyone who feels they need to find out or to simply wants to enjoy a good night out comes along."
